It has been said that emotions are energy in motion; emotions are energy moving through our body. Emotional alchemy will help you take the reins back over this process, so you can use all of that energy to your advantage & use any emotional experience to create positive momentum in your life.
Practicing emotional alchemy is transforming your emotions into gold you can use to create your best life.
This is the strategy that usually meets the most resistance – for both my clients and myself. We live in a world that fears emotion, and as a result, most of us fear our own deep emotions too.
One time, as a teenager, I remember feeling so much heated rage running through me that I ran outside and laid down in the winter snow.
This actually kind of worked… better than anything else I’d found, at least.
I’ve literally writhed & screamed in emotional pain, feeling so alone, so betrayed, so hopeless, so angry… I really struggled with my emotions for a long time.
My feelings are very strong, and I never received tangible guidance growing up about how to deal with my strong emotions – without shoving them down.
Shoving my emotions down only ever led to anxiety, pain, substance abuse, and total meltdowns when the weight got to be too much.
(Check out this article that talks about the link between emotional health and physical health – it’s no joke).
We are always going to experience a full spectrum of emotion. Highs, lows, and everything in between. (Recognizing and embracing this is an important part of Acceptance).
We need a way to deal with the challenging emotions in a manner that doesn’t sink us.
Especially when you’re someone who feels things really strongly, like me.
It is 100% YOUR responsibility to manage to way you feel.
Emotional Alchemy is all about honing your ability to feel really good unconditionally – regardless of your life situation or what the people around you are doing.
It’s about flowing with what you’re feeling on a moment to moment basis, and allowing that feedback to guide you.
Thinking you can rain positivity over your challenging times or just “love and light” your way out of every conflicting feeling you have doesn’t really work – it’s spiritual bypassing.
Emotions aren’t inherently good or bad, they just are.
All emotions are valuable.
When we welcome the full spectrum of emotion, we’re welcoming a full and diverse life.
When we shut ourselves down emotionally, we create a breeding ground for disease in our bodies & discontent in our relationships.
Emotional Alchemy requires switching from resistance to curiosity when it comes to your emotions – curiosity without judgment.
Nothing stuffs an emotion down better than feeling like you shouldn’t be experiencing it, so leave your judgment at the door.
Then take three basic steps:
- Lean in to what you’re feeling. Try to understand where you’re coming from without judgment.
- Feel the feeling completely, really finding the sensation in your body and giving your focus to it, curious for any feedback or messages the sensation has for you. Allow what comes up & stick with it until you feel a relieving shift in your body. (I’ve processed emotions that took days or weeks, but
usuallythis part only takes minutes or moments).
- Examine the situations & your perspectives that led to your feelings. Examine the role you played in everything that led to this emotion. Are there any new understandings that could create resolution & more connection with yourself and the people around you? What can you learn from your experience? What can you do differently & what will you repeat again in the future?
It is extremely helpful to have outside support while diving into Emotional Alchemy, especially during the third step.
This is without fail the first guidance I give to those who work with me – start looking at the
I went deeper into the emotional alchemy process in this video.
For now, I’ll leave you with this question: What emotion is waiting right under the surface of your awareness, ready to be felt?
Share in the comments, or check out my free FB group The Cocoon, and share your answers in there. We would love to witness & support you!
If you really want to take this deeper, I would absolutely love to have you in our upcoming group coaching round of Mental Wholeness – you can sign up to join us here.
If you’re looking for personalized guidance, support, or just to continue the conversation, I’d love to connect with you.
The next strategy is Boundaries.